¡Feliz Navidad! Still alive!
I'm done with Costa Rica, no mas. Ridiculously expensive, yet lots to offer, though [outdoorsy-ish stuff], I guess, but very touristy. It is beautiful, 1st week we spent time in a beautiful beachfront condo [a friend of Heather's] to chill, get online gig-work done, unwind, and cook [see photos of clams and tuna Heather and I made- we ate well!!!]...
Costa Rica: Beautiful but Brutal
Went to Arenal Volcano area- got screwed on our hotel we 'booked', but was an online Expedia scam- took me a day to unfuck it. I thought we would die on the return road home [serious fog, narrow roads, couldn't see the mountain dropoffs, or car in front of me...]- the most stressful drive I've done ever, by far!!!
In San Jose, we lived in a shithole, but I found a Flamenco dance performance that was beautiful. We got there, and it was sold out, though. Leave it to me, who doesn't speak Spanish, to meet the main dancer and another dancer, who spoke English. I scored us some front-row seats, and we were the first to be seated ahead of the lah-dee-dah folks.
At least I got to see CR a long time ago when it was cheap, and there were far fewer tourists.
Panama 1: Rolling In
Rolled into Panama late afternoon, so traffic to the hotel sucked. It took about 45 minutes, and the Uber cost +/- $28. The airport and drive were nice, newer, and clean.
Getting to the city was overwhelming to me. Many monster high-rises, and it is very dense in the thick of it.
The first night, we crawled around our area, ate street food, and danced among the locals. Seems they have a twist to their Spanish language here. The dollar is used as paper, but coins can be returned as Balboa- a 1:1 ratio. We stayed in the Santa Ana district- as per usual, unrecommended for the typical traveler! Reasonably priced, utilitarian digs, but a great view.
Panama 2: Bike Tours & Facials
Yesterday we did the bike tour of our area and Casco Viejo, and it turned out great. Nice to get the body moving, see some things, and check other items off our list. Among the many things we visited, we toured the meat/vegetable market [very clean and amazing], and the seafood market [obviously it smelled like seafood, but seeing the fresh varieties was marvelous!
You can literally choose your items, take them upstairs, and they will cook them for you +/-$7/lb, plus you get some sides with that meal. If not that, then outside of the market are a shitload of seafood restaurant options. Note, ask the price before you buy, or you'll get tourist screwed.
Casco Viejo was a cool area and had many [expensive] restaurants and a cool vibe. Worth seeing, and the biking tour is worth doing!
After we had $10 facials, more street food, walking amongst our people, and came back home for some online work... dropped off clothes at the lavendaria [$5].
Panama 3: Monkey Business
We booked a boat tour to see the monkeys. Picked us up at our hotel, toured a veggie/fruit market on the way, then went to the boat area. As for the market, beside it was a huge fruit terminal where semis dropped off/picked up loads of veggies/fruits. When I am down in some of these parts, it is blatantly obvious and scary how much of a food desert we live in and how reliant we are upon these countries for so much of our basic food supply. The vast array of items is mind-boggling.
The boats could hold an average of +/- 20 people; smaller boats are available, and so are private tours, probably: they are bobbing, slippery, and difficult to get into. So we cruised by a couple of large ships en route to the monkey 'islands'- originally the tops of mountains, now surrounded by water as the valley portions are flooded with water for the shipping lanes.
The first island had capuchin monkeys. Once we got their attention, they were crawling and jumping all over our boat and onto the other tour boats. Wiley lil creatures. They were looking for food, cool to see up close, and one stole a bottle of suntan lotion from a lady.
The next island had Geoffroy's Tamarin monkeys. Tiny guys with long tails. They were a bit more timid, fewer of them, but they came close, not onto the boat, though.
The next island had howler monkeys. About the size of medium dogs, but their howl is scary; they are noted as the loudest land animal. Remarkable once you see their size and hear the volume of sound they can produce. They didn't howl for us, just hung out in the trees and napped or watched us. If you've never heard their howl, I hope you do one day in person. Beyond words, what it sounds like!
We saw a sleeping sloth, a variety of birds, and a baby croc as well.
The Panama Canal
The next day, we undertook a shitty tour-ish - [on/off jumper in a red 2-tiered English bus]. The pickups were very inconvenient and not often enough. BUT, our main goal was to get to the Panama Canal Miraflores visitor center. LOTS of humans!
We saw the Morgan Freeman IMAX movie, which was fascinating, then went outside to watch ships pass, descend, and move on to the next lock. We saw a monster ship in the far [newer/larger] lane, which was inconceivably large. The Canal tour was a very cool thing to do.
NOTE: If you ever do this trip, which I highly suggest, be sure to align your visit with boats passing through the locks!!!! Boats could be hours before passing, we got lucky and saw multiple while there.
We didn't go to the business/commercial area, feeling it wouldn't have any value for us. Casco Viejo is old, quaint, with lots of tourist shops, art galleries/museums/churches, nice restaurants, cool vibes/views, yet ultra touristy. The monkey tour was fun, the bike tour [or rent bikes and/or do the 'free walking tours' - giving a tip at the end of the tour!!!], and the canal tour is worth it for sure.
We took the metro back to the airport. .85 cents/person!!! Clean and easy-ish.
I was surprisingly excited about Panama. Now that I know, I could do it again. Hit galleries, museums, and performances are in the city, rent a place with a kitchen to make incredible meals, then travel to various parts of Panama. My happy point is low-cost daily living, cheap stays, fun/cultural/artistic things to do, and fresh food for cooking- I think that will eventually happen in Bolivia/Peru and hopefully in Colombia.
Montevideo, Uruguay
Got in late to Uruguay, and we are staying in the historic center. That's where I always shoot to go. Staying in an old-school, charming [albeit tired] hotel with a beautiful open elevator [see photo]. Most expensive yet, $44/night.
Upon our late-night arrival we were starving, went to a nearby bar [been there twice now and we're a seemingly novel thing with the locals'], people were extremely nice, offered us weed [first country in the world to legalize- so we had to try it - first time, of course, and didn't inhale...], and we were happy! Up til 2:30+.
Yesterday and today are slow days due to Navidad. Tomorrow we have walking tour plans, here for 2 more nights, then on to Colonia del Sacramento [Uruguay] for 2 nights, then ferry over to Buenos Aires for 5ish nights, fly to Rio for 5ish nights, then to Sao Paolo for 5 nights, when Heather returns home.
Christmas Dinner
Just took a break to have a wonderful Christmas dinner that Heather conjured up:
"Fresh egg pasta primavera with a'tun y pom frites" and a split of Chandon to celebrate: [fresh= crafted using only a microwave, hot pot, and basic implements, noodles= ramen [2 packages], primavera=frozen broccoli medley, a'tun= tuna from a can, and pom frites= crunched potato chips].
The Farmacia Incident
Funny story if you are still with this long travel summary: Went to a farmacia yesterday with the discreet mission to buy an OTC product. Of course, nothing was visible, and unsure if I would have known either way. So, I dove in.
Went to the counter [with no Spanish] and waddled my way through. I knew this was gonna be a cluster fuck, so I just owned it like I was buying ice cream. Of course, they didn't speak English, so others were called in for the big American silly event that was about to unfold.
I finally asked for pricing, and it was across the board with prices like $10/10 pieces. I was appalled and nearly didn't need it right then in my pants after hearing that! I told them that was ridiculous, and they nodded and smiled, knowing I was in price shock. The one English speaker kept saying, "Yes, welcome to Uruguay" with a smile- but in an empathetic way at least.
I wrote it down on paper, LAXATIVE - EX LAX, so confusion reigned throughout the store. Now, nearly everyone working there [6 people] was pulling items off the shelves, tripping over each other, showing me products like I was buying a new Quinceañera outfit, with the sale commission-based. Pointing here, arguing with each other over there...
Heather tried to get a video of this, since we thought it'd be a great skit on SNL, but it didn't materialize. After a few minutes [rather feeling like a half hour] of this and more bickering amongst themselves about 'natural' or not, and sizes, amounts, and strengths... not that it wasn't sideways enough at that point, when a customer felt like she had to jump in with her 2 cents about it- in Spanish, of course.
Good god. Comical at best, and the fact that I can tell you a vulnerable story like this, the outcome and situation are even funnier and worth my embarrassment. [An American walks into a farmacia in Uruguay and asks for a laxative.... joke].
You know me, if there is a laugh to be had, and even if it is on me, I'll definitely share it! No shame. In the end, we left the store empty-handed, save for a pack of Mentos to save face, not butt!
What's Next
I'm amped about the next layer of my trip when I fly to and slow-roll through Bolivia, then Peru, and end in Colombia for the next 2 months. Supposed to be great food, very cheap, beautiful areas. Heather may join me again in Colombia for the last few weeks.
Stay tuned for more misadventures of the traveling sockpuppet,
~E
