On 02/02, Boy, lots to be said. I got another 1.5-hour deep tissue massage [+/-$45, I mean, who wouldn't?!], which was highly needed, then started uphill back home to go to the mercado and grab a quick bite. On the way there, a festival was happening at the church in my neighborhood. Band, food stalls, people... Food = Erich's tummy happy. I found a place that offered traditional dishes for this Christian event: seaweed, fish eggs, fried corn kernels, fried Peruvian tortilla, chicken, homemade sausage, salt-cured alpaca, Cui (guinea pig), and chicha (a homemade fermented corn liquor, not always alcoholic). This event lasts for days; check out the crazy videos I attached. It's a wonderful time to be here. Lots of cheer, food, drinking, processions... wild! These people love themselves some processions.
Shamanic Encounters in Cusco
In larger cities, I usually opt for the "Free Walking Tours" offered by many online vendors (tips are expected). It's a relatively cheap way to get the lay of the land and to pick up interesting tidbits you wouldn't otherwise find out. The guide didn't kill me with his touring skills, BUT, he did turn the group on to his family at the end of the tour. Come to find out, the mother was a true Shaman. Oh boy, oh boy!!! Her table was set with various talismans: crystals, ointments, potions, botanicals, a condor's head... I find this kinda stuff enchanting. I couldn't help myself, so I nibbled. The next day, I came over for a Shamanic Energy Cleansing: Clearing negative, dense, or stagnant energy from a person's body or environment, often using tools like smoke (smudging), feathers, rattles, crystals, or sound. Needless to say, I'm still not perfect, but now I'm finally on the righteous path. If, after all these updates, you think there is any truth to this 'perfect' commentary, shame on you! They also offered much more significant options, such as a San Pedro or Ayahuasca journey with spiritual guides. Some day!
Her table was set with various talismans: crystals, ointments, potions, botanicals, a condor's head... I find this kinda stuff enchanting.
February 3rd: Sacred Valley Tour and Fred's Wild Ride
02/03 I signed up for an all-day "Sacred Valley" tour (6:30 am-6:30 pm). Stopped in 5 archeological places all in/around the Andes Mountains, a Peruvian buffet, driver, and tour guide = $30! There were only 11 of us cruisin' in a Mercedes Sprinter van. Our beady-eyed driver, "Fred", drove like he was practising for a Dubai desert rally, and looked a little like El Chappo. Seriously, who's named 'Fred' in these parts!? He was a man of few words, but on a mission nonetheless. As if scoring points on a video game, he zoomed past other tourist vans left/right with reckless abandon. At least we beat the crowds to the stops. There was one dirt road carved into the side of the mountain going to the salt mines, no guard rails, of course, but that didn't slow Fred's roll down! Good god. Yet, this was nuthin' compared to that chicken bus driver in Guatemala. THAT was ridicuously outta control, and scary how fast that chico was flyin'; as if the bus’s center of gravity belied the laws of physics on every corner. Even though we are in the off-season, there were lots of vans and people all up in the same route. I can't imagine how they fit all the humans into all the places along the way during the season (rhetorical question)?!
Captivating Inca History and Spanish Atrocities
Anyway, WOW, what a beautiful day driving through the mountains, seeing Inca ruins, salt mines, textile area where this is ground-zero for crafting beautiful alpaca/sheep/llama clothing, and hearing historical accounts of the Inca people. Captivating! Thanks to the Spaniard Christians, they wiped out the people, buildings, and culture of the people. This is not their first rodeo in a non-Christian culture, creating death and mayhem all in the name of Jesus; they got the rhythm down. "What would Jesus do?" => not that, I'd venture. Sad to think of not only these atrocities, but those all over the world throughout time where history, engineering feats, smart minds, art, and architectural marvels... get lost to the turmoil of a past. We can now only imagine how it would have been. Counting my blessings today, I feel so fortunate to witness this beauty firsthand. I'll pop in a few pix, but it'll never convey the majesty of the moments.
Sad to think of not only these atrocities, but those all over the world throughout time where history, engineering feats, smart minds, art, and architectural marvels... get lost to the turmoil of a past.
Pisaq and the Perennial Hippie Question
Our last stop was in Pisaq, deserving of a paragraph on its own. Lo and behold, we stumbled upon and witnessed, to my weary and unbelieving eyes, clusters of 'Hippies'. Dirty, shameless little creatures who pro-create lil hippies- a cycle that quite possibly may never be broken. As I sit here pondering the subject, I sense that even a meteorite couldn't doom their kind. I've seen them before, and it makes sense they are here, in the 'Sacred Valley'. These miscreants descend upon and congregate at mystical sites throughout the world. Wearing dazed looks upon their dirty little faces, sporting hairstyles that’d shame a street dog, mismatched clothing, unshaven (herein I refer to the female variety), and tattooed & pierced body parts—spots most of society doesn’t even know exist—one more hideous than the next (it’s an unstated competition, btw). This sort exists underground or in mangers, living off the land (and others, of course), they’re a puzzle to most of mankind. We dared not look in the review mirror as we scurried off, as if zombies marching after us- thanks, Fred! As an aside, I'm praying daily for my NY artist friend Lisa, cc'd herein. I trust in my jaded heart, Lisa, that you, too, will come to your senses someday in realization that the hippy way is a futile and lonely one. Yet, as I sit here in this moment of introspection, I, too, may have to face my truth as I peer into the proverbial mirror. I have been looking quite grubby and disheveled as of late. One could surmise, through casual observation based on dress, unshaven, general unkemptness, and dare I admit, dirty appearances, certain circles may dub me a nascent hippy. One who is quite possibly in an apprenticeship. The implications of such cognizance shake me to my core. Well, stay tuned for this reveal. Without proper counsel, I dare not peer longer into the mirror of truths on my own volition.
The implications of such cognizance shake me to my core. Well, stay tuned for this reveal. Without proper counsel, I dare not peer longer into the mirror of truths on my own volition.
February 4th: Cusco Cathedral and Culinary Delights
Wednesday the 4th, I toured the Cusco Cathedral [disgustingly beautiful- adorned with more carved wood than I've ever seen, and lots of silver- Peru is a huge miner of Silver/gold/copper], the Bishops Museum of religious art housed on the foundation of an Incan royal home [Of course, I'm sure the Spaniards demolished it], a splurge dinner of Sambocco Alpaca with an aguaymanto sauce on mashed potatoes (a scrumptiously plated $10 dish, and 2 pisco sours- I had to, it was happy hour pricing), then a $16 hour long massage, and went home. Mission accomplished! These massage girls on the street are pushy. Some of them have that 'happy ending, amigo?' look in their eyes. This fish didn't bite, fyi.
Departure from Cusco
Thursday, I closed the door to yet another hotel and city. Thankfully, the Uber took me one last time through the city square en route to the aeropuerto to catch my flight to Lima. I will miss the beauty, history, and interesting vibe. The atmosphere reminded me of many unexpected places I experienced in Guatemala and Mexico. Where you had these pockets of coolness, great restaurants, fun music, high-end boutiques, and cafes... all wrapped up in a developing nation with reasonable price points. Had it not been for the damp, bone-chilling cold, I would have stayed longer. Sitting in the square and watching the scene play itself out is unexplainable. It gives me chills thinking about it.
Sitting in the square and watching the scene play itself out is unexplainable. It gives me chills thinking about it.
Final Observations
Peruvian drivers are pure chaos on the streets.
Cui can be good. I think my friend Cynthia is now jealous that I write this outloud. My first experience was with her in Ecuador, many moons ago. A disgusting visual and taste stuck with me all these years. I had to try it a second time just to be sure, and I'm glad I did. The stigma no longer haunts me. Sorry, Cynthia, I cheated on you with a Peruvian Cui!
2nd time I test my theory of not paying for carry-on baggage. Again, if you have a QR code on your phone, no one asks! I'm on the battle lines for you, readers, about this. Someday it may not work, and years later you'll find me in some type of baggage-claim lock-up, paying society for my ill-conceived proclivities, saving a buck. UPDATE: I was writing the first part while literally waiting for my plane to board when the baggage nazi's came out hard over the PA system. The propaganda machine belted out in search of evildoers like me to fess up our indiscretions and settle up, or else... Concurrently, the Gestapo literally began searching passenger bags as they waited. Shit, shit, SHIT. My scheme to beat the man again was falling apart before my eyes in a costly way. Some dude was singled out and ended up gettin' nicked for $70! The flight didn't cost too much more, for phux sake. I was sweatin'. I knew it, off to the gulag for me. I sat elsewhere from my luggage, as if it wasn't mine, but eventually I had to board where that little luggage-sizing contraption sat. I trudged forward, readying myself for an international kerfuffle. As I finally reached the agent, whilst somehow none of the sentinels pulled me out of line, he scanned my phone, and told me my seat is 1D, not 13A {this means I'm upgraded prime beef, and paws off to the gatekeepers}. Curious, but I'll take the win. Then I remembered I bid $19 for an upgrade a week ago, and it kicked in just in time!!! Lesson learned with that carrier! The boarding gods fended off the baggage Oberführers. My rejoicing is tempered for the moment, yet my crusade lives on for another battle, another day.
...at the next dance...
- Are Tuk-Tuks the transportation of the future?!
- Leaving tears in the rearview mirror.
- $16 massage + $10.50 room = what could go wrong!?
- What if the Easter Bunny and St Patrick swapped holidays?
